Dirty Dash 2014

This is my first attempt at making any kind of video on my computer. A movie does so much more justice than words for a race like the Dirty Dash!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ReO9lOCk8Xw&feature=youtu.be

Enjoy!

Much love to you all and happy 30 to me-

~Stef

Reality

Note: this post is not supposed to be sad. It is not intended to be a poor me or anything. It is intended as an opportunity to realize there is happiness in every circumstance even (and especially) when it isn't perfect.

Sometimes social media gives us all a fake perception of real life. We are so closely connected to each other and we perceive what we think are other peoples realities. Whether our perception is a truth or not, we can easily fall into a trap of thinking “the grass is greener for so-and-so" or “I wish I had their life” or “nothing bad ever happens to them” or “poor me”.

I’ve been told my life is enviable and what people dream about. I’ve been told I’m lucky to do the things I do.

Which is truth. My life is exceptional and extraordinary.

But it is also true my life is far from perfect. 

Most people don’t realize I don’t usually speak to anyone after about 10 every night or before 9 every morning. I go to bed alone every night. I am completely reliant on my parents, brothers and sisters-in-law to keep me in “the family”. 

I struggle with insecurities created through trauma of my past. I literally have conversations with myself to talk myself out of pushing guys away or building walls around my heart. I’ve struggled with self image issues and have to constantly remind myself I am beautiful no matter what my outer self looks like.

I’ve become self aware and know how to combat these things. I know myself and am at peace in my life. I am comfortable in my own skin and in my current situations.

In saying all of this, MY LIFE ROCKS!! Seriously, I am so extraordinarily blessed every day. I’m so grateful I have hard things in my life because I have learned how to see a merciful Maker everyday and see that He loves me. 

MY HAPPINESS IS A CHOICE.

I am happy because I choose everyday to be happy. I choose my attitude. I choose to not allow external forces to determine my demeanor or dictate the outcome of my day. I choose happiness. I choose love. I choose to allow vulnerability to enter my life in the hopes of something great coming from it. I choose to not protect my heart and allow God to protect it for me. I spend hours praying to not shutdown, to be open to the spirit, to feel calm and at peace and to not allow past trauma to change the path of my (very bright) future.

I choose.

And so can you.

The grass is not greener in my life. It is just different than your life. My plan A has been different than your plan A and thank heavens for that. I learn so much from each one of you and the journey of your life. I am so grateful I get to be a spectator to so many amazing people. I am humbled everyday by my path and how incredible of a journey I am on. 

Much love to you all and happy 30 to me!

~Stef

The Gifts of Imperfection

Oh my, this book is amazing!! The whole purpose of the book is to help us let go of insecurities and live a wholehearted existence. Every single time I picked up the book, I was enlightened. Literally, EVERY TIME. 

I think back on different passages often and have changed my perspective on different situations.

One of my favorite passages is a check list which has stuck with me. I want to share it with you (hopefully so you will be inspired to read this book!):

-We all have gifts and talents. When we cultivate those gifts and share them with the world, we create a sense of meaning and purpose in our lives.

-Squandering our gifts brings distress to our lives. As it turns out, it’s not merely benign or “too bad’ if we don’t use the gifts we’ve been given; we pay for it with our emotional and physical well-being. When we don’t use our talents to cultivate meaningful work, we struggle. We feel disconnected and weighed down by feelings of emptiness, frustration, resentment, shame, disappointment, fear, and even grief.

-Most of us who are searching for spiritual connection spend too much time looking up at the sky and wondering why God lives so far away. God lives within us, not above us.

She has so many amazing stories and understandings. Her writing style is easy to follow and inspirational. Pick it up- I promise you won’t be disappointed.

To end this review, I want to leave you with one more quote from her book.

“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”

Go live today! 

Much love to you all and happy 30 to me-

~Stef

The Happiest Place on Earth

There are very few things which bring more happiness to my life then spending time with my favorite people. Add those 14 people to The Happiest Place on Earth and you almost have paradise.

Disneyland is seriously one of my very favorite places. Walking away from “real life” into fantasy and childhood is truly magical. It is made even better when you have little kids holding onto each hand, jumping with excitement, barely able to contain the awe and wonder of such a place. 

Vacation started on Sunday. I had been in Boston for work and flew directly to LAX. I beat my family's arrival by a couple of hours and was able to get us all checked into the hotel so we could start playing as soon as everyone arrived.

I won’t go into every detail because it is redundant. We spent Monday and Tuesday and Disneyland and California Adventure, Wednesday we took a break and hung out at Laguna Beach. Thursday and Friday were back to the parks and we finished the vacation at Newport.

I’m not sure it really matters where we are- for me, the happiest place on earth is wherever these 14 people are. 

I was snuggled and cuddled. I never walked anywhere without at least one of my hands being held. I had kids wanting to sleep with me every night. Our days were filled with laughter and love. 

It was exactly what my heart needed. I’ve felt extraordinarily lonely leading to this trip and it was an amazing reminder of how loved I am. There is something magical about experiencing Disneyland through the eyes of a child. 

Our tradition to finish the trip is always Space Mountain. We filled 2 cars full. As we all threw our hands in the air and hollered with joy, I was overwhelmed with gratitude to call these people mine. They are by far my greatest blessing. 

30 rides were ridden in the 4 days at Disneyland. I can check that one off the list.

I hope you all feel loved today. If you don’t, call me and I will remind you how amazing and wonderful you are! There is magic all around each of us and will bring happiness and beauty to even the most difficult of circumstances.

Much love to you all and happy 30 to me-

~Stef